Calling all iOS developers familiar with Apple and their amazing app store rejection policies: How do we get our app into the app store?
They insist that self measuring a distance is a type of … “medical diagnostic”.
Which in itself is hilarious and rather quite telling of where we are at, society wise and babysitting law wise. No, you as your own grown-ass adult can not self measure a distance. Only a DOCTOR can do that. You, can’t be trusted with that sort of complexity.
Which ironically is exactly what optometrists do, and ALL that optometrists do. So in a way, Apple is right. You can’t be trusted with a measuring tape, or digital equivalent.
All that ranted, how do we get into the app store? My thoughts:
A beard-measuring app. Wink, nudge. Dress it all up as a sarcastic beard measuring app. (then of course still get rejected because f*ck)
A face-distance measuring app. Way less fun or funny, but maybe a little obscure.
We have to get an app on there that allows you to measure a distance to your eyes. That’s the whole point.
And before anyone gets started with Android comments. Yes yes I know Android exists and we could just give up and make the thing for Android. Not the answer I’m looking for here.
Also, any artists that would be up for contributing any beard measuring visuals? Otherwise community contributions to make this thing get past the little half witted contractor censors employed by papa Apple?
See below, current app which provides “medical diagnostics”.